To Make It Work "How can I miss you if you are never gone?~Unknown

3) Flirt: Sure, everyone thinks being in a serious relationship means more sex for everyone, right? Not true. With so much going on in the world, it's hard to find the perfect time to share moments like this together. After a while, it may seem like the passion in your relationship is fading away. Take a moment each day to recognize your partners beauty. Flirt with them, even if just for a moment. All it takes is a special look to let them know how you are feeling. This boosts the sexual bond between both members of a relationship and helps ensure that the passion sticks around in the long run. Just like on the first date, you want your partner to feel as if you only have eyes for them. Let them know they are as beautiful as you know they are. Fun flirting creates a bond with driven passion and makes sure that feeling never fades away. This also helps relieve tension and creates a lighter atmosphere between both people. Don't simply begin to expect to have intimate moments together as time goes on. It's not so much a priority as it is a privlidge. 3) Commit: Commit yourself, day in and day out. Both man and woman need to be able to take a step back from their own lives to embrace their partner during a time of need. If they have had a bad day at work, let go of your own issues and take time to listen and care for theirs. Create that important balance between both of you. Be willing to work as a team to overcome relationship problems and be sure that you are ready to enter the relationship. Give 100% to your partner each and everyday so they know there is no other person in your life quite like them. If both members of the party are able to fully commit to each other, trust levels will rise and jealousy levels will fall. Let your partner know they are the only one for you once in a while, not just verbally either. Do something special here and there and you shall recieve the same in return. A happy relationship with two committed members should never falter, never fail. If the relationship falls, both members fall together. 5) Balance: Not everything in a relationship is about your partner. There still needs to be that time for yourself. If you like classical music and your partner likes to party. Make that time. Make time for your own moments of peace. fun and excitement. Make sure these moments do not come at your partners expense though. Be sure that you are in agreement with one another with what is going on. This will fill the holes in your life that your partner alone cannot. "How can I miss you if you are never gone". By spending a little time apart, the bond between both members strengthens and the relationship will grow. Do not simply sacrifice all of yourself to your partner, be willing to budge for the good of the relationship but not give up your own personal hobbies, friends and goals. You are 1/2 of a relationship and your partner is the other. Together you have a whole, but you each still play a huge role apart. Respect your partners needs as well as your own. Be supportive and trust in your partner. Spend quality time together and apart. There should also be a delicate balance between rights and powers within the relationship. Keep a healthy balance so one member of the relationship is not clearly in charge. Thats it. From my own personal mistakes. I have learned alot. After being in falling relationships my entire life, I have discovered all of those things in which I have missed out on. All of the mistakes that I have made. I know now what it takes to develop a healthy and solid relationship and wish to do so. I hope that I will never again be as foolish as I once was and that my future partner(s) are willing to work with me to achieve that. There are a million fish in the sea and I'm just waiting to catch the right one. I hope that not only my own life. but others as well, will find that neverending love that we all dream of. I now recognize and apologize for my mistakes that I have made in the past. Not only to my partners, but also to myself. A relationship is to be cherished and desired. I once had relationships that I wished would never end, but faltered none the less. I wonder now, if I was there now, would I do better? I know I would do things differently, I know I would do better. Take a moment and look at your life. Are you doing all you can to make it as great as it can be?

To Make It Work~"How can I miss you if you are never gone?"~~Unknown~~

There are a million things that can make a relationship work. Hundreds of every day tiny nothings can make Or break a solid relationship. Over 50% of our population here is America is divorced at least one time. Is there any hope for true love Or marriage anymore? I believe there will always be hope, no matter how slim, somebody, somewhere has to be in a loving, happy relationship that will last until death. It's that relationship that everyone else should take notes from. We should observe and learn what it takes to achieve such a happy relationship. Even at a glance, you should be able to tell that it's not money, possessions, Or any material objects. What keeps a relationship alive is an intimate bond shared between those two people. Sounds crazy, I know... but believe me, it's there. Out of all the things we can choose from to engage in our relationships, if we had to only choose five, what would you choose? Here are what I believe to be the five most important things to keep a happy and healthy relationship. 1) Communication: Take about things. NOT just every day common chit chat, but intimate, personal emotions. Make sure that your life is an open book to your partner and theirs a novel to you. You also must be interested in what they have to say, even if it may be talk of the most off beat subject out there. In order to obtain a solid relationship, you must be able to communicate with your partner fully and without fear. People all make mistakes in their lives, but make sure that these mistakes are openly stated. Make sure that you are able to work through them as a team, as one, in a relationship, it's much better to face the problem head on, rather than coming by it down the road and having to deal with the pain double time. This breaks trusts, which break relationships. Try your best to always be understanding of your partner, even if they are commiting murder. Be supportive and loving no matter what. Don't block each other out. Keep your lives completely open to one another. 2) Laugh: Be stupid together. I know it sounds foolish, but laughter is possibly the best cure for any sorrow. Take all of the stress and seriousness out of your lives for just a moment each day. Engage in a conversation that is way off topic, have a pillow fight, watch a funny movie together. Whatever it may be, just take time to enjoy each other's company in a more immture manner. Dealing with everyday life can be tough, and this will help take your mind off of the stress from work and other daily troubles. Don't be afraid to act like your five once in a while. There is a child hiding deep down inside all of us waiting to be left out. Embrace that child with your partner and take it easy for a while. True 'love' isn't always as serious as we may think it is. ................to be continued

"Relationship Rules"~~Part 2

11)Work hard at maintaining closeness. Closeness doesn't happen by itself. In its absence, people drift apart and are susceptible to affairs. A good relationship isn't an end goal; It's a lifelong process maintained through regular attention. 12)Take a long-range view. A marriage is an agreement to spend a future together. Check out your dreams with each other regularly to make sure you're both on the same path. Update your dreams regularly. 13)Never underestimate the power of good grooming. 14)Sex is good. Pillow talk is better. Sexy is easy, intimacy is difficult. It requires honesty, openness, self-disclosure, confiding concerns, fears, sadnesses as well as hopes and dreams. 15)Never go to sleep angry. Try a little tenderness. 16)Apologize, apologize, apologize. Anyone can make a mistake. Repair attempts are crucialighly predictive of marital happiness. They can be clumsy Or funny, even sarcasticut willingness to make up after an argument is central to every happy marriage. 17)Some dependency is good. but complete dependency on a partner for all one's needs is an invitation to unhappiness for both partners. We're all dependent to a degree in/on friends. mentors, spouses and men have just as many dependency needs as women. 18)Maintain self-respect and self-esteem. It's easier for someone to like you and to be around you when you like yourself. Research has shown that the more roles people fill, the more sourses of self-esteem they have. Meaningful work said Or volunteer as long been one of the most important ways to exercise and fortify a sense of self. 19)Enrich your relationship by bringing into it new interests from outside the relationship. The more passions in life that you have and share, the richer your relationship will be, It is unrealistic to expect one person to meet all of your needs in life. 20)Cooperate, cooperate, cooperate. Share responsibilities. Relationships work ONLY when they are two-way streets, with much give and take. 21)Stay open to spontaneity. 22)Maintain your energy. Stay healthy. 23)Recognize that all relationships have their ups downs and do not ride at a continuous high all the time. No relationship is perfect all the time. Working together through the hard times will make the relationship stronger. 24)Make good sense of a bad relationship by examining it as a reflection of your beliefs about yourself. Don't just run away from a bad relationship; You'll only repeat it with the next partner. Use it as a mirror to look at yourself, to understand what part of you is creating this relationship. Change yourself before you change your relationship. 25)Understand that 'love' is not an absolute, not a limited commodity that you're in of Or out of. Says Sollee: It's feeling that ebbs and flows depending on how you treat each other. If you learn new ways to interact, the feelings can come flowing back, often stronger than before. Life is overrated.........

Relationship Rules......

Many people have no idea what a good relationship ia all about. Here are the basic ingredients for a healthy intimate relationship. ~~By 'Hara Estroff Marano'. Human beings crave intimacy, need to 'love' and be 'loved'. Yet people have much trouble doing so. It's clear from the many letters. I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even look like. So I'm using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem. From many sources and many experts. I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it's a start. Print them out and pin them up on your refrigerator door. 1)Choose a partner wisely and well. We are attracted to people for all kinds of reasons. They remind us of someone from our past. They shower us with gifts and make us feel important. Evaluate a potential partner as you would a friend, look at their character. personality, values, their generosity of spirit, the relationship between their words and actions, their relationships with others. 2)Know your partner's beliefs about relationships. Different people have different and often conflicting beliefs about relationships. You don't want to fall in love with someone who expects lots of dishonesty in relationships; they'll create it where it doesn't exist. 3)Don't confuse sex with love. Especially in the beginning of a relationship, attraction and pleasure in sex are often mistaken for love. 4)Know your needs and speak up for them clearly. A relationship is not a guessing game. Many people, men as well as women, fear stating their needs and as a result, camouflage them. The result is disappointment at not getting what they want and anger at a partner for not having met their (unstated) needs. Closeness cannot occur without honesty. Your partner is not a mind reader. 5)View yourselves as a team. Which means you are two unique individuals bringing different perspectives and strengths. That, according to relationship expert 'Diane Sollee, M.S.W, director of Smart Marriages', and international effort to teach relationship skills to couples, is the value of a team our differences. 6)Know how to respect and manage differences, it's the key to success in a relationship. Disagreements don't sink relationships. Name-calling does. Learn how to handle the negative feelings that are the unavoidable byproduct of the differences between two people. Stonewalling Or avoiding conflicts is NOT managing them. 7)If you don't understand Or like something your partner is doing. ask about it and why he Or she is doing it. Talk and explore, don't assume. 8)Solve problems as they arise. Don't let resentments simmer. Most of what goes wrong in relationship can be traced to hurt feelings. leading partners to erect defenses against one another and to become strangers Or enemies. 9)Learn to negotiate. Modern relationships no longer rely on roles cast by the culture. Couples create their own roles. so that virtually every act requires negotiation. It works best when good will prevails. Because people's needs are fluid and change over time, and life's demands change too, good relationships are negotiated and renegotiated all the time. 10)Listen, truly listen, to your partner's concerns and complaints without judgment. Much of the time, just having someone listen is all we need. It opens the door to confiding. And empathy is crucial. Look at things from your partner's perspective as well as your own. ...........to be continued P.S. Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

'Learning to love the one you're with!!"~Part 3

Not having a relationship doesn't keep you all warm and cuddly at night; however, getting yourself ready for a really great 'Love' relationship must be your highest priority. Be true to yourself first, it is well worth the wait. Being alone may call up all the feelings you were afraid you would have if you were ever alone.... and some you could have never imagined. The pain seems to go on and on, though only if you allow it. Healing takes time. Stay with solitude. Don't be tempted. At the end of your tunnel is love-of -self and the healing love that only 'God' can provide. You must attain this awareness before you can be in a healthy love relationship with someone else. In times like these, when you are alone with your feelings, life can feel empty. You can gain much insight into the power of your attitudes in the stillness of looking inward.Your body believes every word you say. Your words and thoughts govern how you feel today and how you will feel tomorrow. A quiet and peaceful mind takes form as a quiet and peaceful body. Peace, be still. See what it feels like to walk hand in hand with yourself. Give yourself permission to do what may feel risky. Discover new ways of thinking and being. To allow intimacy to be present in a relationship with another, you must first seek intimacy with yourself. Some of our clearest thinking about relationships can occur when we are not in a relationship. Our mind is often sharper when informed by our own feelings. We are more humble and acutely more in touch with the hurts of the past. We are far more open to new idea. Take advantage of this opportunity to learn all you can about yourself and what makes a healthy love relationship. It is in the search for what it takes to have a healthy love relationship that we become more receptive to listening for new ways to make our relationships work better in the future. The very process of searching opens up many new options. Make having a relationship with yourself your number one priority. Then, and only then, can you move on to what's next. ~~The End~~

"Learning to love the one you're with!!" part 2

Avoid the self-created fear of being alone. Accept that we do this to ourselves. It can bring no good into our lives. We allow fear to cause us to withhold ourselves from others. Fear breeds insecurities. It could be said, for example purposes, that even Tarzan, Lord of the Jungle, was insecure. He would swing from vine to vine, not letting go until the next vine was 'Safely in hand'. Does this sound familiar? This may make sense when you are in the 'Jungle'. When you are swinging high above the ground, your life depends on it. Your life does not depend, however, on always being in a relationship. The need to be always swinging from one love partner to another is not in your best interest. If you are coming from a love relationship, the last thing you need is another one....right away, that is. In this scenario, there is no safety in numbers. We are so afraid aid of finding ourselves hanging in midair. we latch onto the first available vine that happens along. Not a good idea! Leap into your greatest fear.....be by yourself for a while. Take a good look at what "hanging in midair" feels like. You may be surprised! You will be okay. It won't be the end of the world. Although it may feel like it, that feeling won't last forever. It is wise to practice intimacy with "self" during your abstinence from relationships. Pray to know 'God' better. Thank him for the courage to get serious about the relationship you have with you. Get to know 'God'. Get to know you. Give yourself the gift of solitude. When you are alone....journal. Get in touch with your true feelings. Work on falling in love with yourself for a change and see how great that feels! Be your own significant other. Practice the art of loving you. Take the precious time out that is necessary to rediscover who you are without a love partner. You must first learn to be alone and happy before you can be together and happy. Learn that it is possible for you to live alone and not be lonely. Discover how to be self-sufficient. Don't be dependent on others for your own existence. Know that when you eventually do connect with someone you can love, your happiness will be enhanced by just knowing that being in the relationship is your choice and not something you need Or must have to survive. To have found someone you can share your life with is one of love's ultimate adventures. .........to be continued

"Learning to love the one you're with!!!"

If you have recently come out of a relationship, heed this word of caution.It may be wise to distance yourself from relationships for a while. Take a breather. The tendency of new singles often is quickly to find someone else to be with. Most ministers and mental health professionals agree that, that is not a good idea. It is a colossal mistake! For some people being in a relationship becomes their "drug of choice". They skip around from relationship to relationship. Some get stuck. They feel as though they always have to be in a relationship. They develop the dependency of "needing" a relationship. That is not healthy. Some people allow their feelings of insecurity about being alone to keep them stuck, often in an unhealthy relationship. Our former relationships never cease to provide us with new and exciting questions, the answers to which can lead to the breakthrough necessary for a 'healthy love' relationship in the future. The rewards of personal inquiry are invaluable and can assist us greatly in being ready for another relationship when the time is right. I believe that every relationship we are in serves a definite purpose. It fulfills a need for us as we fulfill needs for someone else. Remember, we should only look back to see how far we've come Or to see how much we've learned. We can look at our past love relationships and focus on the good we learned from them. I must admit that at times this may be difficult. Spend time working on you, Work on developing your own self as an individual. The one you are with is you! Reinvent a relationship with yourself. Make it a new and exciting relationship; one you can be proud to carry over into your next relationship with someone else. Nobody wants damaged goods. Allow time for the healing that is necessary for you to feel comfortable with being alone. That is the only way you can learn how to really be with someone else in the future. After coming out of a love relationship, it is normal to feel rather insecure for a while. It takes a while to adjust to your new beginning. The delayed gratification is worth it. One of the rewards is discovering that the more time you take for yourself, the more love you will have to give to your future love partner. Choose to be alone for awhile. Being independent enough to be alone is a virtue. Cultivate it. When you can learn to be comfortable with being with yourself, then you may be getting closer to being ready for a 'healthy love' realtionship with someone else. During this time of aloneness you will discover a clear distinction between being lonely and being alone. Being alone can help you in getting comfortable about being with yourself. When you are comfortable about being with yourself, your feelings of loneliness will gradually disappear. Spend some time learning to be good company with yourself........ to be continued.........

"I got the Slow Burn"

Demotion to "Friends with Privileges?"/Strong> You're a modern woman Or man capable of being number 2 Or 3 in line,right? And that exactly what this type of partner impresses upon you when they move on to find the person perfect for them (hint:You're not it). Variations include "Come one, we're both mature adults", and "I really enjoy your company, so I see no reason to stop seeing one another because I'm not ready to settle down", and "I don't understand why you're upset". I've been completely honest with you from the beginning. "What these statements really mean is We're broken up, but now I don't have to be guilty about your feelings, plus I get the best of the relationship that I valued". Most likely cause: A selfish partner who has decided that you're not the "One", but doesn't mind stringing you along for the enjoyable benefits (for he Or she, not you) that come with a half-relationship because they never have to give them up. Plus, they never have a fully break your heart, just appease you with the occasional gift Or something sweet uttered to keep you in his Or her good graces. Take comfort in?/Strong> The fact that after a while of being toyed with by this individual that you'll realize that being a modern man Or woman does not mean sacrificing self-respect Or what one is looking for in a relationship. If you are seeking a monogamous, committed relationship, and after a reasonable amount of time dating one another your partner still expresses that he Or she would like to see Or is seeing multiple people, then its time to call it what it is: A breakup that ended long ago, Or even before it started. You may really like how you feel when you've with that person, but the truth is you only have a part-time "relationship", and you and your partner have different goals. In fact, test this: ask your part-time partner if you both have a "relationship". The answer will be "No', Or an excuse that sounds like a veiled version of "No" and includes the words, "Well, technically? So you may have to tough-love yourself; Or in other words, know (and truly believe) that it's over. Nothing you do Or say will "win" back this person as you would like them to be in your life. Walk Down Memory Lane?/Strong> You stopped dating months Or maybe even years ago, but every now and then the phone will ring, a great conversation will be experienced, and part of the magic you once shared will reunite. The phone is hung up and you find yourself wondering if it could still work out and maybe even fantasizing that it could. Then over the course of the next few days, you contact that person and get the cold shoulder. What gives? Most likely caused by: A lonely moment of solitude for your ex. who finds himself Or herself dialing up old memories on the phone one evening. Here a reality check: Nine times out of ten, he Or she is still not available to you. What you're experiencing is nostalgia and the qualities that attracted you to him Or her in the first place. Should you still persist and venture down that path, don't be surprised if the enjoyment of mostalgia is soon overtaken by more realistic. 'Remembrances of exactly why he Or she repels you, and why it never worked out the first time. Take comfort in?/ Strong> The happy nostalgic memories, and being able to periodically enjoy the very best qualities of that person over the phone without having to commit to getting your heart broken Or yourself frustrated by your shared incompatibilities all over again. But unless you've willing to experience a sequel to the original breakup, although this time happening much more quickly, it may be worth it to keep the past in the past and allow yourslef to enjoy your old relationship only as a walk down memory lane. There are exceptions, of course, but there are reasons why someone is an ex?

"I got the Slow Burn"

The Distant Echo?/Strong> Just as the details of good event fade into generalized warm memories, so does the relationship that fades out into the distant echo of a solitary person left completely alone asking himself Or herself why phone calls, e-mail and voicemails go unreturned. Is there an echo in here? Surely when the phone stops ringing and days of silence turn into weeks, the end of a relationship is on the horizon. Most likely cause: There are numerous possible causes that come in to play with a distant-echo breakup. Sometimes the relationship is a casual one that never got serious enough to warrant the "relationship label". Other times the relationship may have started out intensely, but now has suddenly come to a crashing halt. (See also: Sizzle and Fizzle, below.) Whichever the case may me, the relationship has already ended for the disinterested partner they just haven't told you yet. When it comes to love, communication skills are learned over time through the trials and tribulations of dating and relationships. However, some people are still climbing up the learning curve when it comes to expressing their honest feelings, especially when it is suspected that a partner will be disappointed and maybe even a little bit angry. When interest in pursuing the relationship further plumments, these guys and gals let time be their distance and silence their way of coping with the uncomfortable idea of delivering bad news. When the phone stops ringing and the e-mails and voicemails go returned, there is, in fact, something going on. Someone blessed with more maturity would, of course, confront the situation head on, but the anti-confrontational sort can even handle his Or her own "I'm a bad guy" feelings, let alone your hurt feelings, and so the silent front moves in. Take comfort in?/Strong> The fact that maturity is not overrated. You can choose to be angry, and that is okay, especially since in many cases the esscape artist tormerly known as your love interest probably came on pretty strong in the beginning of your involvement. After you're worked out your feelings, though, congratulate yourself for not dating someone with the breakup coping skills of someone in high school of early college years (you) deserve more than that! Sizzle & Fizzle?/Strong> How could something that felt so right now suddenly feel so wrong, sometimes to the point of, "What was I thinking?" Not just for the urban chic, a la 'Sex and the city', the 3-months (or 3 weeks!) relationship that glides in to a breakup is a common occurrence, especially in younger age groups, and frequently, these types of experiences can be painful because one person feelings are stronger and clearly wants it to work. Most likely cause: Simply put, chemistry without compatibility, combined with too fast, too soon, is usually the culprit. When physical attraction trumps common sense, and all things physical progress too quickly, the frequent fallout is an ending almost as quickly as the union began, much to the chagrin of one partner. Take comfort in?/Strong> The lesson learned that getting too close too quickly without getting to see all sides of your partner. While it is painful, the anger you may be feeling toward your now ex is mostly a projection of self-anger, and it's okay, you got swept up in a series of moments that took your breath away, and because of their intensity, you wanted it to be the "real thing" (i.e, lasting love.) Or maybe on some level, you knew that it had no chance for longevity, but you went for it anyway because it was new and exciting. The next times this happens you'll recognize that even with the pull of strong chemistry, it pays to take things more slowly.

"I got the Slow Burn"

The slow burn?/Strong> This relationship should have ended a long time ago, but has persisted into a slow and agonizing confirmation of one worst suspicions that the relationship is just not working out. In these situations, both partners have their own individual degrees of unhappiness, but the more dissatisfied person stays because it feels "easier" and "less messy" than having the courage to confront the truth and move on. There may have been recurrent communication problems that have never been resolved Or are avoided if they do arise, and other potential mates outside the relationship are beginning to look like attractive alternatives. Despite the relationship seriously degenerated quality, it never quite ends fully, leaving at least one partner in a hurtful no-man land of ambiguity, and this person responds typically by trying harder to win affections Or by becoming passive-aggressive, sometimes to the extreme. Jealousies of outside parties are common, and often the relationship will dissolve only because of developed interests in other potential mates outside of the primary relationship. Most likely cause: Not the right combination of compatibility and chemistry. Chemistry is the physical attraction component, and compatibility is composed of the personality traits and attributes that in the right combination can persevere through a lifetime. While there may be enough of both of these elements to maintain a relationship for even several years, eventually the attraction wanes, and there is not enough of these core traits to survive life changes and challenges that arise as people move through life. The same goes for a relationship founded on compatibility but lacks physical chemistry. The relationship can be rewarding for a relatively long time because both partners get along together so well, but there will always feel like there is something missing in the chemistry department. Because there are lacks in the relationship, one Or both partners may begin taking on outside interests in secret, even if beginning only in his Or her mind as fantasies. As the relationship wears on, though, many times one partner will stray, cousing the breakup. These are tricky situations because there has been so much time invested in the relationship; even though "hanging on" in a relationship is still a relationship, it is not a healthy one. Take comfort in?/Strong> The fact that you have experienced a tremendous learning experience by having shared your life with someone who has taught you a lot about love, life and yourself. As you heal from the relationship end, it is perfectly normal to miss your now ex-partner, but do know that kind of love you're looking for he Or she kind in which your partner feels the same about you as you do themselves out there. Dating someone new may be the last thing on your mind, and it may feel as though you, I never find someone like your ex, but love will surprise you if you are open to it. First things first, though: You have to heal. Cry, get angry, get support, if needed, and get interested in developing the new you.

"I got the Slow Burn"

Something pretty cool that I got from an e-mail. It can be very insightful and helpful at the same time. Although I warn you this might run a little long though. Enjoy everyone. What happened? Finding out that your relationship has ended from your partner can seem like one of the most convoluted mysteries of life. How could something so promising for you become so pass? for your partner? No matter how the news was delivered, the process of healing from an unrequited breakup nearly always passes through the "I just need to know what he (or she) is thinking and feeling". and yet, any amount of in-person conversations, phone calls, e-mail Or text messages ever provides the closure desired he/she sting of finality is a burn only time and self-discovery can heal. Here is a breakdown of six types of relationship fallouts that may provide some insight in to what happens when relationships go wrong, much to the disway of the partner who still wants to work things out. The 180?/Strong> You had no clue. Everything was going so well (or so you thought!). Even the past weekend was spent in romantic bliss, and for the first time you felt as thought things were really going to work out . Then come Monday, you get the phone call that starts with a reluctant tone and somewhere hesitant, "Hey, got a few minutes?" that only ends with a welling of emotion and a box of Kleenex. Most likely cause:Your partner likes you and enjoy your company, but got cold feet when the relationship started to feel committed and more serious. Usually this point is breached within three to six months from the start of the relationship. The notion of long-term relationship may be the furthest from this type of partner mind, and so when faced with the prospect of commitment, He or She must bow out of the relationship. Take comfort in?/Strong> The fact that your partner told you sooner rather than later. It may seem like it came out of the blue, and it may have, but your partner was never ready for the kind of commitment you would like, and once He or She realized it, they let you go. While it hurts now, in the long run you will more on to relationships that are more in line with what you are looking for all levels. In order to be ultimately rewarding for both parties, interest in and dedication to the relationship must be relatively equal. Having stronger feelings toward someone than he or she can reciprocate is a recipe for heartbreak, no matter whether your relationship has been going on for three weeks Or three months, The one thing your partner has not realized yet is that by spending his Or her life with a series of 'Mr. or Ms. Right Nows, knowing full well they aren't Mr. or Ms. Right is a recipe for chronic dissatisfaction not only for your partner, but also for each person he or she becomes involved with.