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"Learning to love the one you're with!!!"
If you have recently come out of a relationship, heed this word of caution.It may be wise to distance yourself from relationships for a while. Take a breather. The tendency of new singles often is quickly to find someone else to be with. Most ministers and mental health professionals agree that, that is not a good idea. It is a colossal mistake! For some people being in a relationship becomes their "drug of choice". They skip around from relationship to relationship. Some get stuck. They feel as though they always have to be in a relationship. They develop the dependency of "needing" a relationship. That is not healthy. Some people allow their feelings of insecurity about being alone to keep them stuck, often in an unhealthy relationship. Our former relationships never cease to provide us with new and exciting questions, the answers to which can lead to the breakthrough necessary for a 'healthy love' relationship in the future. The rewards of personal inquiry are invaluable and can assist us greatly in being ready for another relationship when the time is right. I believe that every relationship we are in serves a definite purpose. It fulfills a need for us as we fulfill needs for someone else. Remember, we should only look back to see how far we've come Or to see how much we've learned. We can look at our past love relationships and focus on the good we learned from them. I must admit that at times this may be difficult. Spend time working on you, Work on developing your own self as an individual. The one you are with is you! Reinvent a relationship with yourself. Make it a new and exciting relationship; one you can be proud to carry over into your next relationship with someone else. Nobody wants damaged goods. Allow time for the healing that is necessary for you to feel comfortable with being alone. That is the only way you can learn how to really be with someone else in the future. After coming out of a love relationship, it is normal to feel rather insecure for a while. It takes a while to adjust to your new beginning. The delayed gratification is worth it. One of the rewards is discovering that the more time you take for yourself, the more love you will have to give to your future love partner. Choose to be alone for awhile. Being independent enough to be alone is a virtue. Cultivate it. When you can learn to be comfortable with being with yourself, then you may be getting closer to being ready for a 'healthy love' realtionship with someone else. During this time of aloneness you will discover a clear distinction between being lonely and being alone. Being alone can help you in getting comfortable about being with yourself. When you are comfortable about being with yourself, your feelings of loneliness will gradually disappear. Spend some time learning to be good company with yourself........ to be continued.........
If you have recently come out of a relationship, heed this word of caution.It may be wise to distance yourself from relationships for a while. Take a breather. The tendency of new singles often is quickly to find someone else to be with. Most ministers and mental health professionals agree that, that is not a good idea. It is a colossal mistake! For some people being in a relationship becomes their "drug of choice". They skip around from relationship to relationship. Some get stuck. They feel as though they always have to be in a relationship. They develop the dependency of "needing" a relationship. That is not healthy. Some people allow their feelings of insecurity about being alone to keep them stuck, often in an unhealthy relationship. Our former relationships never cease to provide us with new and exciting questions, the answers to which can lead to the breakthrough necessary for a 'healthy love' relationship in the future. The rewards of personal inquiry are invaluable and can assist us greatly in being ready for another relationship when the time is right. I believe that every relationship we are in serves a definite purpose. It fulfills a need for us as we fulfill needs for someone else. Remember, we should only look back to see how far we've come Or to see how much we've learned. We can look at our past love relationships and focus on the good we learned from them. I must admit that at times this may be difficult. Spend time working on you, Work on developing your own self as an individual. The one you are with is you! Reinvent a relationship with yourself. Make it a new and exciting relationship; one you can be proud to carry over into your next relationship with someone else. Nobody wants damaged goods. Allow time for the healing that is necessary for you to feel comfortable with being alone. That is the only way you can learn how to really be with someone else in the future. After coming out of a love relationship, it is normal to feel rather insecure for a while. It takes a while to adjust to your new beginning. The delayed gratification is worth it. One of the rewards is discovering that the more time you take for yourself, the more love you will have to give to your future love partner. Choose to be alone for awhile. Being independent enough to be alone is a virtue. Cultivate it. When you can learn to be comfortable with being with yourself, then you may be getting closer to being ready for a 'healthy love' realtionship with someone else. During this time of aloneness you will discover a clear distinction between being lonely and being alone. Being alone can help you in getting comfortable about being with yourself. When you are comfortable about being with yourself, your feelings of loneliness will gradually disappear. Spend some time learning to be good company with yourself........ to be continued.........
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