How to Not Be an Obsessive Girlfriend?~~Part 2

Tips~~edit *Hang up the phone. If you're calling him 24 hours a day, STOP. In worst case scenarios, turn your phone off. It's okay to call and see how his day is, but if you're calling every couple of hours, this could reinforce his belief that you have nothing else going on in your life. People are attracted to interesting people. If your only interest is him, then he's going to lose interest in you. Some ideas to refrain from grabbing the phone are: Call a friend, take a nap, go for a walk and pick flowers for him, learn something new that you can discuss with him later, learn more about his hobbies/ interests through research. *Start a journal. Write your feelings, not what you did during the day. Try to discover why you feel a certain way. Insecurity often leads people to act in ways that men would describe as crazy. If you're worried about losing him, dig deep into why you feel that way. Not how is he acting, but why You are concerned about losing him. Fear of being alone? Fear of rejection? A journal is a place where you can explore your thoughts and feelings without having to set them in stone. It should be an area where you can express every possible emotion without fearing recrimination. Once on paper, re-examine it, does it still sound true to you? What can you do so that you won't fear rejection Or loneliness, and can become more confident in who you are? *Stop following him when you aren't together. Don't follow him when he says he's going to a friend's house so that you can check up on him. This is an instant message to him that you don't trust him. Men aren't stupid; they see your car parked down the street. *Create situations that have an ending point. For instance, you want to hang out with him during the afternoon, ask him if he's interested and then suggest that after the outing he can drop you off at your house. This gives him the freedom to decide if he would like to spend the rest of the evening with you, instead of feeling as if he's trapped into spending it with you. *Communication. Ask questions and then listen. Clarify anything you may not understand by asking questions. *Quality time, not quantity time. Use the time you do have together wisely. Ask yourself if you'd rather have 8 hours of mediocre time with him, Or 2 hours of fantastic time together. *Trust, Obsessive behavior usually stems from a feeling of mistrust. Unfortunately trust can only be built over time, but you must have a basis to build from. If you don't feel you can trust him while he is away, discuss this with him. Also, ask yourself why you feel this way. What is he doing to cause this mistrust in you? Is it his actions, Or are you drawing from past experiences? What can you do to help yourself face this fear? *Approach all arguments Or discussions with an open mind. Be willing to listen and understand his side. *Remember that each relationship is different, and no two people are alike. *In general, without realizing it, we tend to be attracted to people who show the better qualities that are within human beings. Love, Beauty, courage, kindness, confidence, trust, honesty and friendliness are some of these qualities and there are many more. When we live out our best qualities, we tend to be attracted to and we attract others who do the same. We tend to want to avoid people who live out some of the worse qualities. When was the last time you were attracted to bitterness, meanness and cruelty in a person? ..........to be continued